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Category Archives: Feeling

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “To Be Resolved.”
https://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_prompt/to-be-resolved/

The resolution that I continue to seek is how to parent, and build a relationship with my adult children from a distance far away not to block their view, but let them see that I still keep a light on in the window.

When it comes to the relationship with our children, I don’t know that we ever reach “resolution” because we each change every day.  I am trying to respect the distance even if my experience with my parents was different.

Since this is a major goal in my life, and always was, I am reprinting this post from July 16, 2014.

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theempathyqueen

generations by gilad

I love you and you will always be my child. I have been trying to stretch and grow to accommodate your view of life, but I realize that I am uncomfortable at times. Perhaps, it is because I am out of my comfort zone trying to be inside of yours. When I raised you, I had hoped to give you good character and kindness. Given your origins, independence, intelligence, and strong opinions could not help but be part of your nature. Sometimes, those opinions hurt me. You know I am sensitive and I was an easy target. But, still, I love you.

You have chosen to live your life differently than I have chosen to live mine. I try to keep my door open to you whenever you want to walk through it. We have made, and continue to make, different choices. I did not want to choose sides. I…

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if u want happiness

Have you ever heard something that made your mouth drop open? I have — until I close it, realizing that I look like a trout waiting for the hook.

As an empathetic idealist (I have the Kersey and Myers Briggs to back that up) certain scheming behaviors simply don’t occur to me. It is not that I am dumb, although some might think that I am a naïve simpleton, but actually I am too busy looking at faces, energy, spirit, psychology and the mysteries of the mind. It does not occur to me to look for the “fast track” to get ahead or how to make my next dollar.

Don’t get me wrong, my debt is crippling like everyone else I know.

I have the capacity to get angry, outraged, and incensed like other people. My ego is solidly planted and justice is very important to me. I have plenty of opinions and knowledge and I am not afraid to use them.

However, when you are looking up, and looking out to others, you are not focusing on material goods. You are thinking about empathy, kindness, compassion, caring and lightening someone else’s load. The most amazing people we have ~ teachers, social workers, nonprofit and charitable employees, volunteers, therapists, nurses, soldiers ~ are compensated so poorly for the level of heart and effort that they put into all that they do for others. They are too compassionate, and wired for empathy, to turn away. The funds are not there and they struggle to support their families. But, they do it anyway.

Others figure out how to get the best deal and all the back doors to “success.” How do we measure success? Is it only by the bankbook? There are children who grow up wanting to be rock stars or multi-millionaires. Others want to be policemen and firemen. They want to be teachers and artists. They want to help others and seek employment doing just that even though they are not compensated well for all that they do for others.

There are many lists that measure the richest and the most powerful. Magazines are devoted to the wealthy life and hotels that cost more per night than most people make in a month. They are indeed beautiful, and it would be very nice. Ahhhhh… but apparently I was meant to work for the money I have in this lifetime.

The wealthy that impress me are the altruistic and philanthropic ones who genuinely want to see improvement in the world. They are ambassadors and fighters for the needs of those suffering, in numerous ways, all around the world. They want to improve education in the classroom and bring opportunities for growth and job opportunities. They have achieved staggering levels of income but they are also giving extraordinary amounts to help others. It may be a tax deduction, but how you give charity shows if you really care about it.

Some people are experts at all the dirty tricks and prioritize them. It did not occur to me to look for the lowest common denominator.

Sorry, — I am an idealist and I am too busy looking up!

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The RSA recently put out an animated video of Empathy vs. Sympathy that went viral. In fact, if you put the information in a Search Engine, you can find hundreds of links to it.

That put me on a search for Empathy in other videos and film shorts. There are some fascinating examples of animation from Cal Arts and short videos and excerpts.  Many Hollywood film productions go for the dramatic, exacting our sympathy with harsh tragedies and weeping grief and dying.  They pull out our tears with the obvious. Empathy can be a little more complex *like the Empathy Queen herself* and make you think some more about the topic.

This delightful short will explain Empathy and put a smile on your face (at least I hope it will). If you feel like I do, by all means, share or leave a comment.

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A good post reaches for your heart and remains on your mind.

Thanks for stopping by! It means more than you know.

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The Empathy Superhero
empathy superhero

Wouldn’t it be wonderful to be able to give strength to others as well as yourself?

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Thanks for stopping by. It means more than you know!
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